Relationships are inarguably one of the most confounding and magical facets of being human. From the first spark to the first kiss, there’s something truly intoxicating about falling in love and being in a devoted relationship. But what happens when the partnership goes awry?
While it’s true that no relationship is perfect, many bonds can survive a slew of problems when proper effort, compassion, and understanding are applied to the partnership. On the other hand, some challenges in relationships can be truly irreconcilable.
Sometimes, it can be difficult to discern the difference between healthy vs. unhealthy relationships. So, if you’re struggling with your partner, you might be grappling for guidance or wondering if it’s time to end the relationship. Here are the top tell-tale signs that it might be time to say goodbye to your mate.
Abuse Is Never Acceptable
Apply a zero-tolerance policy for any type of emotional or physical abuse. If your partner is degrading, abusive, or violent towards you, it is definitely time to end the relationship. No one should be ill-treated, and being subjected to abuse is inexcusable.
Lack of trust in a relationship is one of the top reasons for breakups. If your partner has given you reasons to mistrust, it might be time to rethink your relationship. Even if you don’t have concrete proof, you might have to follow your intuition to determine if your partner is trustworthy.
For instance, a highly sensitive person such as an empath can sense disturbances or questionable behavior in their partners. If you can relate, then it’s time to have an honest, open conversation with your partner about trust issues and reassess the relationship.
Living Separate Lives
While some couples function exceedingly well at living in separate rooms or having bifurcated lives – that’s not always ideal for everybody. When two partners are spending less time together and more time distancing themselves from each other, it might be time to think about what are the uniting factors in the relationship.
Codependency and Rescuing
If you find yourself constantly enabling or rescuing your partner from demise, that is a tell-tale sign that it might be time to reconsider the balance in your relationship or perhaps even time to let go. Codependency in a relationship can be slippery to identify. It could manifest in you or your partner constantly saying “I’m sorry” or either one of you incessantly trying to fix the other’s problems.
If you suspect codependency issues in your relationship, make efforts to seek professional counseling. If behavioral modifications cannot be made over time, you might be better served to nurture the relationship with yourself rather than your codependent partner.
While any kind of addiction can destroy a relationship, many couples find ways to manage, cope and heal these problematic issues. However, if addictions such as substance abuse, gambling, or infidelity become a glaring conflict, this might be a clear sign to reevaluate the partnership.
If, after counseling and open communication you and your partner are still staring at the elephant in the room known as the addiction, perhaps a separation is in order.
Dreaming of Another Life
It’s normal for all of us to fantasize about things like being fabulously rich or traveling the world. However, dreaming of a life with a different partner could be a major red flag. When you cast yourself into the future, and can’t envision living it with your mate, what does that say about your relationship with him or her?
There’s nothing untoward about having the occasional fantasy, but when it happens frequently, and you’re clearly unhappy in the existing relationship, you may need to make changes to honor your needs.
Lack of Respect
The very nature of coupling poses a compromise. However, if you find your partner is consistently disregarding your values, boundaries, or personal wellbeing – that’s a glaring lack of respect.
When your partner continually scoffs at your beliefs or always stomps on your perspective, that’s something to scrutinize in your relationship. There’s nothing wrong with holding different opinions or values. Nevertheless, there is no excuse for a partner that constantly runs over you as a human worthy of respect.
The Last Word on When to End a Relationship
At the end of the day, the choice to break up requires thought, investigation, and weighing your needs against what you’re actually receiving from the relationship. If, after communicating with your partner or undergoing couple’s therapy, you still find your needs left unmet, it might be time to sever the ties.