Being saddled with an introverted personality can prove to be awkward in all manner of situations. Job interviews, wedding speeches, and conference calls are just a few examples of the many circumstances which can cause a shy person to break out in a sweat. When it comes to relationships, introverts often face an assault course of challenges to overcome. So if you’ve connected with someone interesting via some dating service, what are the top five tips for introverts?
Try to relax
Although it might sometimes seem easier said than done, one of the key aspects of getting through any dating situation unscathed by nervousness is to try staying relaxed. It’s always a good idea to put things in perspective. If you happen to be out for a date with an attractive partner who is obviously into you, remember you’re not about to be judged just because you happen to be shy. And it’s not as if you are attempting to impress a new boss! Wherever you happen to be for your social encounter, take a few deep breaths before meeting up, and then smile and embrace the situation with enthusiasm.
Find common ground
When you are about to take someone out on a date for the first time, do some preparation. There’s nothing more guaranteed to strike terror into the heart of an introvert than an unwelcome conversational lull. This is when your communication skills are sorely put to the test, and if they are found wanting, the resulting silences can prove to be excruciating. Do a little research about your prospective partner, either by asking questions of friends or by politely nosing around their social media. Find out what their interests are and be prepared to talk about these. Familiarise yourself with their hobbies beforehand so you can fully engage with the conversation.
Work on building a real rapport
As your date unfolds, the more you get to know your new partner, and the greater the sense of chemistry which can develop – the unspoken connection which will draw you closer together. Once you can create this natural bond, you don’t have to rely so heavily on your discussions. Once you have arrived at a place where you are mutually comfortable in each other’s company, even an unfolding silence can strengthen how you feel as you look into each other’s eyes without feeling the need to punctuate your encounter with superfluous sentences.
Focus on your passions
Think about the activities you are particularly drawn to. If you have hobbies or passions which you deeply care about, then bring these into the open. Never feel as if your date is not going to be interested in something just because they don’t happen to be a practitioner themselves. On the contrary, it is far more likely they will greatly enjoy hearing all about it, especially if it is something you are eager to relate with a spark of genuine enthusiasm. So be prepared to paint a mental picture with an over-the-top celebration of whatever topic you happen to be an exponent of. Your partner will be impressed and wonder what else you might exhibit such passion for.
Don’t be afraid to showboat!
Finally, one attribute fairly common to introverts is a reluctance to raise their hand over the parapet. But if you want to truly impress a partner, don’t be afraid to show off a little. If you go out for a meal, engage with the waiter in small talk. Joke with the barman as he prepares your drinks order. You’ll be offering tantalizing glimpses of the extrovert lurking beneath the quiet shell.